December 12, 2017

Australia humble England to level Ashes Series

Ricky Ponting in a 'before' shot. Mr. One Word answer he was. Now like Donkey in Shrek we can't shut him up.

Australia have bounced straight back from the disaster of Adelaide to level the Ashes Cricket Series with England by trouncing them inside four days at the WACA ground in Perth.

After an awful start on day one the Aussies with the help of a Mitchell Johnson half century got up to a total of sorts of 268. England were well on the way to making that looking embarrassing at 74 without loss in reply.

Then Mitchell Johnson fresh from 0-170 at the Gabba and getting dropped decided it was time he did something. One hundred odd runs later England were all out and Johnson was basking in the glory of 6 wickets for 38 runs. Being such a tremendous sportsman he was also generous with his time by giving the England batsmen some useful coaching pointers to help them with their game.

There are two reasons for Johnson’s success. He shaved off his Movember mostache and he read newswarped’s column declaring Australia the ‘new’ New Zealand. That was obviously too much for the Aussies and they decided to do something about it.

It has to be said that they were assisted by the England cricketers who obviously spent considerable time after the Adelaide Test reading about their newly aquired ‘godlike’ status.

Australia captain Ricky Ponting pointed his broken finger at six players who were off the chart in both self confidence and form at the moment. They are – Mitchell Johnson, Mike Hussey, Shane Watson, Ryan Harris, Ben Hilfenhaus and Brad Haddin. Notice he didn’t include himself on the list.

Now we go to Melbourne for the Boxing day test match all square. Australia are going to need another big one here. Graeme Swann will already be licking his smiling lips at the prospect of Sydney so it is important for Australia to go to Sydney one up and put the added pressure onto England of needing to win to retain the Ashes.

There is no predicting this series anymore. After a rare no-result in Brisbane and lopsided victories to either side in Adelaide and Perth, who knows where it will go from here? Maybe Ahmed from Lahore knows? I bet he does.

Now we have Australia and England confident at the same time. Throw in the Channel Nine commentary team who are going gaga that Australia have won a Test, and we have the whole hen house cackling at once. The mute button has never looked so good.

Australia 268 (Johnson 62, Hussey 61) and 309 (Hussey 116, Watson 95, Tremlett 5-87) beat England 187 (Bell 53, Strauss 52, Johnson 6-38) and 123 (Harris 6-47) by 267 runs